Whilst we may have boundaries, rules, and have learnt to say no and make the right decisions, it is important not to get too tied up in following rules for their own sake or becoming too strict! Else we will become legalistic like the Pharisees.

The "principle" of the rules are the important thing.

For example yesterday I had a digital sabbath where I refrain from using the internet or computers for a day.

However I had a brother who needed some boarding passes printed urgently for flights that evening. Am I going to refuse by sticking rigidly to my own rules? No!

The principle of the rule is not broken, which is to prevent me sitting there browsing away on the internet when I actually want to force myself to do other things. It was right for me to the good thing and get his family onto those flights.

Jesus says the same thing in Matthew 12:1-14

"He said to them, “If any of you has a sheep and it falls into a pit on the Sabbath, will you not take hold of it and lift it out? How much more valuable is a man than a sheep! Therefore it is lawful to do good on the Sabbath."

This is a very important point. It is the same with any advice or guidelines we give out. What is it we are trying to achieve and why are we saying it?

Only then can we ask ourselves if the aim is being achieved, even when the rules may appear to have been broken or bent.

When considering rules we most also consider that there are many matters that are judgement matters, or matters of opinion or personal choice. In these circumstances we do not have the right to give binding rules.

See Colossians 2:16 - 3:17.

I myself am vegetarian. But I clearly do not have the right to force or judge other people who are not!

I must however add that rules are of course are different to sin.

"Do not kill" or "Do not steal" are not matters of opinion! They are laws, and laws are not permitted to be broken.

But let us not be too judgemental or harsh on other matters, or "rules" or "advice". The principles of them are the important thing, not the letter of them.

Google has a motto "Don't be evil". Jesus' motto is however even better.

He simply says lets "do good".

Therefore lets not be judgemental of each other, but simply do good to each other!

Biblical decision making begins with a willingness to submit your intentions to God's perfect will and humbly follow his direction. The problem is that most of us don't know how to figure out exactly what God's will is in every decision we face—especially the big, life-altering decisions.

This step-by-step plan lays out a spiritual road map for biblical decision making. 

1.Begin with prayer. Frame your attitude into one of trust and obedience as you commit the decision to prayer. There's no reason to be fearful in decision making when you are secure in the knowledge that God has your best interest in mind. Jeremiah 29:11
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

2.Define the decision. Ask yourself if the decision involves a moral or non-moral area. It is actually a little easier to discern the will of God in moral areas because most of the time you will find clear direction in God's Word. If God has already revealed his will in Scripture, your only response is to obey. Non-moral areas still require the application of biblical principles, however, sometimes the direction is harder to distinguish. Psalm 119:105
Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path.

3.Be ready to accept and obey God's answer. It's unlikely that God will reveal his plan if he knows already that you won't obey. It is absolutely essential that your will be completely submitted to God's. When your will is humbly and fully submitted to the Master, you can have confidence that he will illuminate your path. Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding.
Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.

4.Exercise faith. Remember too, that decision making is a process that takes time. You may have to resubmit your will over and over again to God throughout the process. Then by faith, which pleases God, trust him with a confident heart that he will reveal his will. Hebrews 11:6
And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.

5.Seek concrete direction. Begin investigating, evaluating and gathering information. Find out what the Bible says about the situation? Gain practical and personal information that relates to the decision, and begin writing down what you learn.

6.Obtain counsel. In difficult decisions it's wise to get spiritual and practical counsel from the godly leaders in your life. A pastor, elder, parent, or simply a mature believer can often contribute important insight, answer questions, remove doubts and confirm inclinations. Make sure to choose individuals who will offer sound biblical advice and not just say what you want to hear. Proverbs 15:22
Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed.

7.Make a list. First write down the priorities you believe God would have in your situation. These are not the things that are important to you, but rather the things that are most important to God in this decision. Will the outcome of your decision draw you closer to God? Will it glorify him in your life? How will it impact those around you?

8.Weigh the decision. Make a list of the pros and cons connected with the decision. You may find that something on your list clearly violates the revealed will of God in his Word. If so, you have your answer. This is not his will. If not, then you now have a realistic picture of your options to help you make a responsible decision.

9.Choose your spiritual priorities. By this time you should have enough information to establish your spiritual priorities as they relate to the decision. Ask yourself which decision best satisfies those priorities? If more than one option will fulfill your established priorities, then choose the one which is your strongest desire! Sometimes God gives you a choice. In this case there is no right and wrong decision, but rather a freedom from God to choose, based on your preferences. Both options are within God's perfect will for your life and both will lead to the fulfillment of God's purpose for your life.

10.Act on your decision. If you have arrived at your decision with the sincere intention of pleasing the heart of God, incorporating biblical principles and wise counsel, you can proceed with confidence knowing that God will work out his purposes through your decision. Romans 8:28
And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.

The gang! Church in the park!

The power to say NO. Even Jesus said NO. This has to happen if we have set our own personal boundaries.

Jesus himself said no to inappropriate behaviour :-

• Demands. He withdrew from the crowds who wanted him, for one-on-one time with the Father (Luke 5:15-16).
• Abuse. He fought his way through the crowd that was trying to throw him off a cliff for claiming to be the Messiah (Luke 4:28-30).
• Entitlement. He didn’t give in to his mother and brothers who tried to use their relationship with him to pull him away from the crowd he was ministering to (Matthew 12:46-50).
• Baiting Questions. When the religious leaders asked him baiting questions to make him look foolish he answered with incisive questions of his own (Matthew 21:23-27, 22:15-22).
• Cynicism. He said no to Herod’s mocking demand, “Show us a sign that you are the Son of God.” (Luke 23:8-9).
• Manipulation. He said no to Peter and the disciples who had an inappropriate agenda for Jesus to a political king or military warrior rather than a sacrificial lamb. (Matthew 16:23).
• Pride. He didn’t heal those who were too proud to trust Him (Matthew 13:58).